Birthday Girl: 3

Oh, my little honey pie.  Here we go again.  Another year older, when I feel like only a week has passed since the last one! So today you turn three.  Mind = blown.  Not really.  I know you don’t yet understand Mommy’s frequent use of sarcasm and figurative language, and I wouldn’t want you think my head has actually blown off my shoulders.  No, sweet pea, what Mommy means is that the very idea of you turning three REALLY stretches my brain, because it doesn’t seem possible that the tiny, chubby little bundle of smiles placed into my arms just yesterday is now the lanky, long-haired beauty who calls me mama.  Actually CALLS me mama.  Says the word.  It stops my heart.

(no, not really)

It’s been a tough year, hasn’t it, punkin? Our family went through a lot of big changes, and you had to meet a whole new team of teachers and therapists and helpers.  You had to learn new sounds and smells and meet all kinds of new people and, just because you’re getting older, you had to try new toys and skills and foods.  Mommy went back to work, and even though I’m still home with you all day, I’m much more tired than I used to be and sometimes I take that out on you. 

You did some pretty amazing things, though, in spite of it all.  You started walking all by yourself, and now you’re even working on climbing! You’re so much more patient and brave with new people than you used to be.  You know every word of your favorite books, and you turn the page all by yourself when you know that it’s time.  You got over your fear of the swing, and now it’s your favorite thing! You love to jabber, jabber, jabber, all day long.  Mom and Dad think the sound of your voice is just so pretty.  Sometimes you even sing! We hear you singing along with your favorite CD’s, right on the beat, and (almost) right on key.  And your rhythm! You LOVE to kick and clap and bang your hands to the beat of the songs you know so well.  You just amaze us every day.

Libby Joy, I know you’re frustrated sometimes.  I know your mind is ready to do so much more than your body allows.  You are a big-girl-three-year-old in so many ways, but in so many others you’re not even close.  You are so very smart, and smart enough to know that you want MORE.  Baby girl, when you are feeling sad like this, Mommy might give you a great big hug and squeeze you tight.  I’m not quite sure what has gotten you so worked up.  I wish I could understand what’s going on inside that pretty little head.  But when you feel me hug you close and smooch your cheeks, this is what I’m trying to tell you:

I want you to know that I am so proud of you.  Whatever has scared or frustrated you, I have every confidence that you will conquer it soon.  You are so tough, and you have so much determination.  You inspire your Mommy to push through things that I think are really tough, too, because I want to be as brave and strong as I know that you are.  And most of all, when I squeeze you tight, I want you to feel warm and safe and loved.  I love you so much, sweetie.  You are the light of my life.  I love you when I sing you songs and read you books and tickle your belly.  I love you when I do things you hate, like brush your teeth and wash your hair and make you eat.  I love you when you make me cry and when you make me laugh.  I love you all the time, and nothing can ever change that.  I will always be here for you, cheering you on and watching you grow, helping you along and learning from you.  Everything I give to you, you give me back times ten.  THIS is what I’m saying when I hug you tight and dry your tears: you, Libby, are the best gift ever.

And here I thought it was YOUR birthday.